Earth: A Comedy Guide

Good morning Ladies and Bruces…

Funny…I type that and the dog bolts from my room like I’m a vet with a really big needle…oh well…guess my feet will be cold for a few minutes.

Day one of vacation was a disappointment.  Went to the pub which was too busy…the TV screens were too small (almost Freudian slip as I initially typed ‘TV screws’)…and there was no bar maid to flirt with.  I like the bar dude there, but I just don’t swing that way.

So, onto day two which…after that disappointment, I decided to brighten my mood this morning by watching a few Youtube excerpts from Monty Python Live at the Hollywood Bowl…my Facebook Bruces will shortly be subjected to a few of those vids…gods save you all.

Could use more sheep dip, though.

Immanuel Kant was a real pissant
Who was very rarely stable.
Heidegger, Heidegger was a boozy beggar
Who could think you under the table.

David Hume could out-consume
Schopenhauer and Hegel,

And Wittgenstein was a beery swine
Who was just as schloshed as Schlegel.

There’s nothing Nietzche couldn’t teach ya
‘Bout the raising of the wrist.
Socrates, himself, was permanently pissed.

John Stuart Mill, of his own free will,
On half a pint of shandy was particularly ill.

Plato, they say, could stick it away–
Half a crate of whiskey every day.

Aristotle, Aristotle was a bugger for the bottle.
Hobbes was fond of his dram,

And Ren Descartes was a drunken fart.
‘I drink, therefore I am.’

Yes, Socrates, himself, is particularly missed,
A lovely little thinker,
But a bugger when he’s pissed.

– The Bruces Philosophy Song, Monty Python

I still prefer Bruce from the biology department…well, except that I prefer brunettes and redheads…

For this morning’s festivities, after I have transcribed an interview for the deaf (and that is no joke, actually), I will be enjoying Jon Stewart’s “Earth:  A Visitor’s Guide” which I downloaded yesterday.  I did listen to the beginning and it sounds hilarious…and I need hilarious right now.

Stewart is not George Carlin…and y’all know I miss Carlin…but he may be the next guy for me.  I like Stewart’s almost Canadian style of running with a serious story to the point of absurdity.  And if you do like that style, I highly recommend Rick Mercer and/or This Hour Has 22 Minutes…for the record, Mercer first started as one of the hosts on 22 Minutes.  However, I think Stewart is a bit sharper than Mercer…just a bit.  Mercer is fantastic, don’t get me wrong, but for the first time I think the Americans have found someone who is not only willing, but able to make fun of them without insulting everyone…Bill Maher tried that, and he can be funny, but his arrogance tends to turn me off.

I have heard, and only seen bits, of Colbert…so cannot yet talk about him, but I intend to edu-meh-cate myself on his work as well.

Regardless, I still think Canada is king of the comedy heap…after the original Monty Python troop moved on, I think we passed the British who are still #2…but finally the Americans appear to be catching up.  For the better part of 20 years, Carlin was easily the brightest star in the US comedy sky…of course there were Robin Williams, Billy Crystal, Paul Reiser, and even Stephen Wright (…and a lot of people liked a guy I didn’t that somehow got a comedy about nothing running for nearly a decade)…but they each had a schtick that they stuck to.  Williams, recently, after his heart surgery, has slowed down his delivery I noticed on his last recording…his old stuff was good, but this slow down made him that much better for me…so to Stewart, I’d put him a close second at this point.

What the fuck is this, comedian power rankings?

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